She’s gone like the rain /
Behold the shining yesterday

Craig has posted a follow-up on Thought Balloonists with a link to your post:

http://www.thoughtballoonists.com/2008/04/our-eddie-from.html

Best,

CH

Well, I will try to meet the challenge from Jarett Kobek, all the more so as he did a great job deciphering the one and only recording of “I´m Not There”. I have to abandon my first conclusion, that the song is a torso, largely unintelligible. It is not. I would say it is a traditional ballad under transformation into baudelarian poetry.
The reason this song didn´t make the Basement album is that it was never finished. This is the raw material for a song. It seems the idea was conceived as early as 1956, so we can assume that it should not yet be packed with metaphors and imaging. We should try to keep it simple. The original concept probably had structural limitations or hooks that could not easily be mended. Some pieces just grow over your head.
But the song has an engine inside, even in this raw state it possesses an eerie drive. We recognize ideas or structural elements from other, later songs. Somehow, “I´m Not There” is formative. It´s generating offspring.
My first hypothesis was a kind of Pretty Polly story, but it´s hard to make that stick. My second hovered around “Baby Stop Crying”, a woman somehow glued to a less worthy guy, and the singer tries to change that. But the actual theme is rather betrayal, the singer betrays a woman in trouble. It seems she gets pregnant. The singer is then designed for fatherhood, and that fills him with dread: “No, I don´t belong to her/I don´t belong to ev´rybody”. Then, what happens? Perhaps she marries rich – the “long forsaken clown” of the final verses. The singer agrees to it, and now we possess all the requisites of a tragedy (or melodrama), and should expect people to die.
Morally, anyway, we are in Pretty Polly land. We are witnessing the singer´s efforts to disentangle from this web of guilt, and complicity. He shifts the blame onto others.
On the other hand, it might be worse. Or a lot simpler. She perhaps just married a nice car dealer in Fargo. Who knows? The snowballing added to it, through the years, the inner dynamics of the song itself. Heartfelt thanks to Jarett and the contributors to his blog, it has been great fun. The asterisks indicates comments in the notes.
Knut C

I’m Not There -
Bob Dylan
1 It´s all right
2 And she holds her tight *
3 In my neighborhood
4 She cried both day and night
5 I know it because he was there *
6 It’s a milestone but
7 She´s down on her luck *
8 And she´s (at her) daily saloonin
9 But to make a part a buck *
10 I was then … *
11 I believe where she´s stopping
12 What if she wants time to care? *
13 I believe that she’d
14 Look upon ´t, deciding to care
15 And I go by The Lord in ways
16 She’s on my way
17 But I don’t belong there
18 No, I don’t belong to her
19 I don’t belong to ev’rybody
20 She’s my Christ-forsaken angel
21 But she don’t hear me cry
22 She’s a lone hearted mystic *
23 And she´s saying carry on
24 When I’m there she’s all right
25 But what if she´s not when I’m gone? *
26 Heaven knows that the answer
27 She’s don’t call in no one *
28 She’s the way, a-sailing beautiful, *
29 She’s mine for the one
30 And I lost her, hesitatin´
31 By temptation less it runs
32 But she don’t holler me *
33 But I’m not there, I’m gone
34 Now I’ve cried tonight
35 Like I cried the night before
36 And I’m leased on the horizon *
37 But I dream about the door
38 She says So long, Jesus Saviour *
39 By fate, worse to tell
40 It don’t hang confirmation *
41 She smiles fare thee well
42 Now I was to keep the lily *
43 I was born to love her
44 But she knows that the kingdom
45 Weighs so high above her *
46 And I run, but I race
47 But it’s not too fast to sleigh on *
48 But I don’t perceive her
49 I’m not there I’m gone
50 Well it’s all about diffusin´
51 As I cry for her t´ fail *
52 I don’t need anybody now *
53 Beside me to tell
54 And it’s all affirmation
55 I receive, but it´s not
56 She’s a gold hearted muse *
57 But she´s gone like the spot
58 And she want *
59 Yes, she’s gone like the radio
60 The shining yesterday
61 But now she’s a-home beside me *
62 And I’d liked her here to stay
63 She’s a bone forsaken beauty
64 And it´s “dont trust anyone!”
65 And I wish I was beside her
66 But I’m not there I’m gone
67 Well, it’s two hearts mistaken *
68 And I don’t far believe
69 It’s all bag for the musing
70 But she’s hard, too hard to leave
71 It’s a loan, it’s a crime *
72 The way she won’t be around
73 But she´s told for the hatred
74 of this long forsaken clown *
75 Yes I believe that it´s rightful
76 Oh I believe it in my mind
77 A bell tolled, like I said *
78 When I – before – carried on the crime
79 And she said th´old jester told her *
80 Like I said, carry on *
81 I wish I was there to help her
82 But I’m not there I’m gone

Notes:
2. Les Kokay is quite right in suggesting this reading. The scene is set in a few lines, and she must be holding a baby in her arms.
5. Dylan might slur a bit, but I hear a “he”. The validity of my suggestion rests with the general interpretation of the song, and the “clown” or “jester” in the last verse.
6. The “milestone” is her becoming a mother, but she´s down on her luck.
9. Seems like Dylan sings “salooning”, as one commentator claimed, setting her as a waitress in a cheap joint. Next line should in that case be “are making but part (of) a buck”. It might well be the waitress from Tangled Up In Blue. But the point is: She´s not able to provide for the baby, not at this point.
10. Definitely a “was”, and possibly “there” instead of “then”. With this line the singer leaves the present, and becomes retrospective.
12. Starts with a “whiff”, which might be a condensed “what if”. Then the rest of the verse makes sense. What he wonders is, whether she wants a baby to care for. Or something like that. Yes, she wants to walk by the Lord, but then he doesn´t.
22. Lone-hearted seems more intelligible than longhearted. Resting on a “n” turns it into a “ng” sound. In connection with the preceding line: Let´s say he tried to persuade her to accept abortion, but she won´t listen, stunned by the wonder of procreation.
23. A quite clear “she´s saying carry on”, coherent with lines 78-80, she seems to be going through with something that will cost her (and them) dearly.
25. Foreboding disaster. Can she make it without him?
27. She doesn´t call in anyone, she doesn´t take advice
28. She´s the way, plain sailing – i e he should have taken the consequences of his actions, but he hesitated too long.
32. She doesn´t holler, she might be too naive to realize her plight. But probably her reaction to his hesitation was another, she thought the new circumstances required a husband of some means. Perhaps she hoped to be able to meet the singer secretly.
34. “Now I’ve cried tonight…” The singer stresses the message in lines 21-22: “But she don’t hear me cry/She’s a lone hearted mystic”. Her mind is set, and she has shifted into another gear. Now he accuses her of being “forsaken”, but who is really forsaken? Did she really have an alternative?
36. I tried to settle for “heights”, but I agree that it seems to be a slurred “horizon”. It should be a variation on the theme of the preceding verse, he is exiled to limbo but is dreaming of returning home, or perhaps he is just looking for an escape.
38. This line starts with a barely audible “She says:” She knows her action is irrevocable (compare with line 7) and possibly disastrous. She takes the devil into the boat.
40. “It don´t hang confirmation”, sounds odd, but I think the singer wants to tell us that she knows there are no guarantees this will work out.
42. The word “keep” is quite clear, but “lily” is smeared to “lirry”, r and l are very close consonants, technically. It´s a daring interpretation, but the simplicity of it and the evident parallel with the next line (and, indeed, the entire song), Dylan style, is very convincing . Probably “lily” was inserted for some earlier metaphor and misread.
45. NB: “the kingdom weighs so high” – the social condemnation of a pregnancy outside marriage.
47. The singer describes the betrayal, he tries to avoid her, but it´s not too easy a small town. He tries to keep up appearances. I buy “sleigh on”, Dylan uses the expression in the first Travelin´ Wilbury´s album which much the same intonation.
51. Dylan sings “fail”, not veil. I don´t see the necessary tie betwen the diffusion and the veil, but English is not my native language. Does he want to see her veiled? No, ambivalence. He rather wants her to miscarry, so they can go on like before. Or that the rich man will go back on his word. He does receive affirmation, but not the kind of affirmation he hopes for.
52. He sings “meaned”, tumbling the letters.
56. Sounds like “muse”, it´s of minor importance.
58. Seems superfluous, but I think it gives us the key to the next verse … she wants something, but it is best left unsaid.
61. This is the climax of the song, where it should turn according to all the rules of drama. And it does. But how? She´s gone, but at the same time is “a-home beside me”. He wants her to stay there, at his place, and he wishes he was beside her. In the grave? But she is holding her baby in line 2. So perhaps we should hear: “She has a (new) home beside me”? She should – at this point – be living with another man. But I think both these interpretations are wrong. This must be it: She comes home to the singer, and makes him a proposal – and she confirms the secret deal with a “Don´t trust anyone!”
67. Kokay opened the entire ending for me with his comment on this line: “It´s two hearts mistaken…” Here the singer starts to deal with the aftermath of what has happened, and he puts solid blame on her – as she initiated the course of action – and later on the clown, who invited the situation. The truth of this interpretation follows from the simplicity: everything falls into place.
71. “It´s a loan” – if she married an older man, he “loaned” the bride. It´s a crime that a young woman should be forced to marry an old guy, and it justifies what´s coming. Stretching it, the “loan” might be the baby, but the singer is too self-centered to see it that way.
73. Unclear, but it seems she tells people or just the singer about her hatred for “the clown”, or – perhaps psychologically more convincing – his hatred for her, if he was set up the way he might have been. The singer probably just believed the clown was a mean old bastard.
74. So here is an answer, Jarett, to your request of the identity of the clown. He must be the guy to whom the girl turns in her distress, and who – it seems – accepts to marry her despite her condition, thus saving her reputation. Naming him a clown indicates that he is an older man, that has been courting her for some time, thus in the eyes of all young lovers a ridiculous man. But also quite determined – once married – to keep her under firm control. Originally he had no reason to hate her, so we would rather expect her to hate him, though she might have told the singer another story. The clouded wording gives the impression that she led the singer to commit a heinous act.
77. Warning bells tolled. He should not have trusted the girl.
78. Dylan definitely sings “crime”, a parallell to line 71. Now vengeance somehow hits the clown or the girl, or both, for their crime against nature.
79. “And she said th´old jester told her…” Now, I might deceive myself, but after twenty listenings this is still what I hear. So “jester” it is (known from countless Dylan songs), and the “old” matches the “long forsaken” clown. This is a guy that could not easily get a woman. The girl excuses herself to the singer, she claims the jester/clown knew about the arrangement and told the girl to “carry on”, that is to bear the child though it was not his. We recognize the crucial “carry on” push from line 23. But he didn´t know. The singer claims he was deceived by the girl, that he could not foresee it would all backfire.
So the “clown” is not identical with the singer, he´s a third person deeply involved in their relation. He is pivotal to the story, and as it is a rule for any drama to introduce key figures early on, preferably in the first act, the clown should be in there from the start, which is why I looked twice on line 5. Somebody caused her to cry. And as he is mentioned in the past tense in the opening lines, he was dead by then. I guess he found out and decided to dump her in the street.
So you see, Jarett, the story is clear enough. Though of course, the better poetry the more work to unearth the connections. /KC

I think you’re right about there being no “definitive” version of the song– one of the real treats & virtues for anyone interested in Dylan is the changes he’s introduced into his body of work.

There are no definitive Dylan songs. If we (for the moment) ignore the talent and genius of the man, this willingness to change is what has always distinguished Dylan from his contemporaries, and why, nearly 50 years after the release of the self-titled debut, his live shows remain totally compelling.

(I haven’t seen the film, but I gather this Dylanesque quest for new identities is at its heart. As I mentioned in my post, I’ll probably see it someday, but I have no pressing interest. Why see someone else reiterate one of the major themes?)

That said, “I’m Not There (1956)” strikes me as a song which demands an accurate transcription of its recording. The reasons for this are:

#1. It’s a totally unique entry in his body of work. It stands out even in the Basement Sessions.

#2. Unlike a lot of Dylan’s other one-offs, it’s a major song. This makes it different than something like, I don’t know, “See You Later, Allen Ginsburg.”

#3. Dylan apparently is never going to revisit it.

To my mind, these three points (and others could be made) make a pretty compelling argument that what we’ve got is all we’re going to get, so we had better try and make as accurate a transcription as possible. (Another reason which I might add is the atrocious qualities of the other existing transcriptions.)

Anyway, I’ve been extremely happy to see how much interest & commentary this blog entry has generated. Bully capital for the suggestions of other people. Dylan people have long been some of the best on the Internet!

Yours,

Jarett

Now this basement recording is evidently a trial, Dylan jumbles the phrasing, there is some mayday rhyming and a lack in poignancy. I don´t have a clue why the date of the song is set to 1956, but I believe Dylan carried along notebooks from his youth, and that he tapped into them during his convalescence. Most of the basement tapes share an immediacy that tells of youth, but they are refined, that is: dead wood is eliminated. This is not the case with “I´m Not There”. But on the other hand, all texts develop in this way. I can see him try to read from a haphazardly corrected script during the recording, “when” becoming “then”, etc. Sometimes he´s not able to save the line.

So there cannot be a “correct version” of this song, and if Dylan suddenly volunteered one, it would be the 2008 version and God knows what were his original intentions, 40 or 50 years back. So the text is floating, it´s in a state of being born. And as such very interesting, as I can see how Dylan taps into the subconscious flow – containing painful childhood memories and first loves as well as congress recordings, fiery hormonal imagery and tonnes of radio and tv shows. The primeval soup of poetry.

I don´t think Dylan cares much if someone tries to bring some order into the text, but I would not like to see it streamlined. Good poetry should have a raw quality. Adding to it is like polishing Emily Dickinson, it tells you more about your own hangups than about Dylan´s. And I do think there is a logic in the lyrics, though not one of detail. The associations must be coherent, and not back-stabbing. And there´s a development in the text from being there to not being there. That is a direction of psychological time. Otherwise it´s Lynch.

I was able to clear up a few points during my session, though I will be back with that after checking other commentaries. Seems like interpretation is quite a collective business, as opposed to poetry writing.

Recalling Humpty-Dumty.

Knut Carlqvist

Calling names and insulting people does no good, and doesn’t endear you to anyone. Grow up.

I have never read such a pile of arrogant racist drivel in my life. I am a UK expat living in Dhaka and therefore one of the people you attack in your petty mail. I even went to the show in question last weekend.

As you are so rich and intelligent (as you constantly point out), I would have thought that you would understand exactly why you were barred from buying a ticket to the play. Firstly it had absolutely nothing to do with Dhaka Stage – so your whole diatribe is directed at the wrong people anyway – but because of the Nordic Club rules, which are in place in reponse to the policies of your “Government”. I use the word “Government” in the loosest possible terms.

As you may be aware (being so well educated..) it is illegal for Bangladeshis to drink (except of course the rich ones who “buy” medical certificates to say they need alcohol) and the government are currently cracking down on any establishment where Bangladeshis are drinking. (Except of course the ones rich Banglas frequent….)

The main target is of course Expat clubs, as they are one of the few places where alcohol is legally available. As a consequence the diplomatic clubs (including the Nordic Club – the venue in question here) are having to take measures to keep Banglas out for fear of being shut down if the police/RAB raid the club and find a Bangla drinking. The American Club in Dhaka has recently stopped allowing expat members of non-diplomatic clubs (IC & BAGHA) into its club for this reason. This means that foreigners are also being banned from entering expat clubs because of the behaviour of law breaking Banglas.

Perhaps now that you understand exactly why you were barred entry – because your excuse for a Government are “cracking down” on Banglas drinking illegally – you will issue an apology to the members of the Dhaka Stage who you have insulted.

I’d also like to say that you are obviously the worse type of Bangla there is, one who has been to the US and returned with a chip (or should that be a fry…)on his shoulder, the type who no doubt treats the “poor uneducated” Banglas left here with a level of contempt that an expat would never stoop to.

Dhaka Expat